Alone At Midnight

You are waiting for midnight in the middle of the night. Today’s was already stained with the yesterday. Feelings don’t pass as easily as days and that’s why you need time to heal. You were crouched on the left side of your bed with your back against the wall. Your heart was down but your body upright. Arms  wrapped around your legs. Head up.  You slowly clawed at the naked skin. Both arms punishing each other. You want to bleed. You want an analogy of death to spill out of your body. Your expression is blank but your head flustered with one image in a loop. Can it end? Will it end? It’s now half past midnight. Your not sure if you want time to slow down so you can breath or speed up so it can be over. Both so deadly. You wait for someone to come find you. To come save you. But you have to be loved or in a tower for that. So you decide to kill yourself. You need to get up for that but you are paralysed by nothingness. So you stay frozen. You black out. You wake up. You’re alive but you are also dead. You lay in silence. You wait for midnight in the middle of the day. You wait to hit reset.